First Dates: First Date Do’s & Dont’s
First dates can be nerve wracking, and they often render even the most experienced of daters shy, silent and prone to making awkward and embarrassing mistakes that blow the chances of getting a second date even before the initial meeting is over. Here are some pointers to help you put your most attractive foot forward and make a good impression.
- 1. Do be on time. The last thing you want to do is make a bad impression on your date by being late. Tardiness implies that you don’t care. Even worse, the person you’re meeting may not hang around to wait for you to turn up.
- 2. Do make your partner feel comfortable. We’re all a bit on edge during a first date with someone. Trying to put your partner at ease and get him or her to relax will also help you stay calm and enjoy yourself.
- 3. Do be an interesting date. The worst thing you can do is show up for a date with someone and then sit there all night and talk about nothing — or, even worse, stay so silent that they might as well have eaten dinner alone. Don’t make yourself easy to forget.
- 4. Do laugh at their jokes. Even if you’ve heard the joke 100 times or more (or it just isn’t funny at all), laughing along with your date will communicate that you are interested in them.
- 5. Do keep the conversation alive. That dreaded silence, during which you’re both scrambling to come up with something — anything — to say, can seem to last for eternity and will make both of you think the other person is boring. Jot down a few questions ahead of time. Practicing for the date can make all the difference.
- 6. Do take an interest in your date. Listen when he or she is talking. Be interested in what they have to say, and show how interested you are by asking questions about what they like to do, read, eat for dinner, etc.
- 7. Do go somewhere unique. First dates don’t have to be to the movies or to a restaurant for a nice meal. You will make a longer, lasting impression if you get creative.
- 8. Do be confident. Confidence says a lot about a person. Being more confident will help you get through that first date with ease and let your partner know you’re comfortable with who you are.
- 9. Do be yourself. You won’t fool anyone by pretending to be someone you’re not. Also, if you’re planning to continue seeing this person, the real you will come out eventually, so you might as well start off by introducing them to who you really are, flaws and all.
- 10. Do stay safe. Take your cell phone with you, plan to drive yourself and let a friend know where you’re going, who you’ll be with and when you’ll be back.
- 1. Don’t be late. First impressions count, and if you’re late, this will make your date think you’re lazy and didn’t care enough to plan ahead.
- 2. Don’t talk about yourself all night. There is nothing worse then a person that loves to talk about herself all the time. How vain can you get?
- 3. Don’t talk about past relationships. Maybe that’s how you lost the last one. Nobody wants to hear you drone on about your ex and what she did or didn’t do. Concentrate on this new person, and see if you can get to the second date.
- 4. Don’t eat with your mouth open. It’s gross. Your date is there to see you, not your food.
- 5. Don’t bombard your date with extremely personal questions. Like you, they probably don’t want to reveal too much about themselves just yet. If you like each other and want to continue the relationship after this first meeting, there will be plenty of time to ask questions and delve deeper.
- 6. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. So he likes dogs, but you’re a cat person. Pretending otherwise will only make the other person feel deceived and turned off when they discover the truth. Find someone who wants you for you, not for who you’re pretending to be.
- 7. Don’t forget to thank the other person for the date. This is not only good manners but also gives you a chance to end it, if you’re not interested — or to ask them out on another date, if you are.
- 8. Don’t propose marriage or kids, unless you never want to see that person again.
- 9. Don’t pursue sex after your partner has said no. Period. It’s tacky, and it proves you’re a jerk.
- 10. Don’t get drunk! As much as drinking copious of alcohol to calm your nerves sounds like a good idea, think about how bad you’re going to feel if you miss most of your date because you’re in the bathroom revisiting your meal. Additionally, this kind of behavior will show your love interest that you can’t control yourself and don’t know your limits. It also isn’t safe — getting drunk and lowering your inhibitions is likely to put you at risk of unwanted advances, and you won’t be in the right frame of mind or body to do anything about them.