Blind Dates: The Basics of Meeting A Stranger
Your friend has just set you up with a guy you have never met and know nothing about, except what she has told you. You have those fears. What if I don’t like him or what if I like him but he doesn’t like me.
Well don’t worry, we are here to help:
Be Open Minded
Remember this is a blind date. You have never seen this guy before. Don’t form a mental image of him or have high expectations. You will only be disappointed if he is not how you imagined. You will know within the first few minutes whether you are attracted to him or not.
Keep it Short but Sweet
Don’t arrange to meet at the cinema, for dinner, or any where else that could keep you together for more than an hour. Arrange to meet up for a coffee, or during your lunch break. If you are not interested in the guy, then you can make a quick exit if you have only agreed to meet for half an hour or an hour, and if you do like him then you can stay where you are or arrange to meet up again.
Your Exit Route
It is crucial when on a blind date that you have an escape route. You could get a friend to call you 30 minutes into the date and if you don’t like him you can make an excuse and leave. If you do like him, you can tell your friend to call you back later. (Remember to always let someone know where you are). Or you could tell him that you promised your friend you’d go shopping an hour after you and he planned to meet. If the date is going well, pretend to go call her to let her know that “you’re not up to going shopping”. Go shopping if you aren’t interested. You could get some friends to turn up at the meeting point and if things aren’t going well you can leave with them. If things are going well, tell them you will meet up with them later.
One of the biggest mistakes people make when going on a blind date is trying to be someone they aren’t.
When meeting someone for the first time, be yourself. Whether that means going all out, or remaining casual, your personality will shine through only if you’re not trying to be something you aren’t. While first impressions are important, do not feel the need to wear heels on a Sunday if you’d normally wear flip-flop sandals. He wants to know who you are; not who you think he wants you to be.
Better Safe than Sorry
Whilst going on a blind date can be exciting and fun, remember that you have no firsthand knowledge about the person you are meeting. If you have been set up through mutual friends, they will most likely have a rough idea of your plans. But just in case, make sure someone knows exactly where and when you’re meeting.
If the person you are meeting is a complete stranger, however, you need to take even more precautions. Make sure someone knows your whereabouts, knows the name of the person you will be meeting, and how long the date is scheduled for. You may want to have a friend join you, or “run into you” about 15 minutes into the date to check up on you.
Who’s Paying ?
Make it clear from the start if you intend to pay for half of everything. You may not want to feel like you owe the guy anything.
Parting after a blind date has the potential to be very awkward, but it doesn’t have to be! Should you kiss him, if you like him? Should you tell him you aren’t interested? It’s always best to do whatever you think feels right. If you are interested in going out with him again, make sure he knows it and tell him that you will call. If you aren’t interested in seeing him again, make sure that you let him know. It’s better to be honest then stringing him along to false hopes.
Getting to Know Him
Pay close attention to the things he says, which can reveal a lot. Discussing taste in music, film, food, and art can be a great way to find out if you two have common interests – or nothing in common at all!
You should also look for common “warning signs” when on a blind date. If the guy does any of the following, watch out!
- Talks about his ex-girlfriend throughout the date
- Doesn’t offer to pay for the first date (or the second, or third…)
- Speaks badly about his mother or ex-girlfriends
- Treats the waiters and/or staff rudely, or doesn’t tip
- Remember not everyone’s tastes are the same, and there will be things about a guy that you do not like, such as lack of hygiene etc..
These are your own warning signs, so don’t ignore them!