Many young men have an attraction and fascination with more mature, older women. Cougars, as they are sometimes known, are popular with younger men because these confident ladies know exactly what they want from life, or a relationship, and know how to get it. A guy who is dating an older woman is likely to be engaged in an exciting connection that goes beyond his dating expectations.
To ensure that your experience of dating an older woman is a pleasurable experience and fond memory here are 10 things to avoid:
1. Never Mistake Her For Your Mother
Beware of treating an older woman as a mother substitute. When you’re dating an older woman it is important that you view the connection as equal. Although she has maturity do not insult her by acting up and fooling around. Remember that she has the confidence to walk away from you whenever she feels the connection is no longer right for her.
2. Never Assume She Is Grateful
An older woman has greater experience of life than a younger girl, and this includes relationships and sex. Just because she is not married or attached does not mean that she is grateful for the attention of any guy. A confident older woman can have her choice of male company whenever she chooses, so never assume you can call her up when it suits you.
3. Failure To Chase
When a younger man is dating an older woman he needs to pursue her in the same way he would a younger female. Men enjoy the thrill of the chase, and women (young or mature) love to be chased. An older woman may have a demanding career that she has full control over, but when it comes to romance she is happy to let a man take the lead. Failure to chase the cougar means you are unlikely to bag your prize.
Although the term ‘cougar’ is attached to the older woman/younger guy connection never refer to her as a ‘cougar’, ‘sugar mummy’ or any other derogatory name. Respect her and the intimate connection and avoid labeling it.
To make any type of relationship work clear and open communication is vital. When you are dating an older woman it is important to understand that she highly values honesty and communication. Unless you clearly communicate exactly what you’re seeking from the relationship you are unlikely to get lucky. Do not assume that an older woman is into the connection for the same reasons as you. When you assume that she wants a serious relationship or a casual hook up you automatically ruin your chances of having exactly the type of connection you want. Be a man and communicate your desires. Unless you know what you want and she wants you’re unlikely to be communicating from the same place.
Although a younger man may feel he’s got lucky, in hooking up with a beautiful non-demanding older woman, often he does not have as much control in the relationship as he thinks he has. A younger man, who is dating an older woman, is more likely to completely lose himself in the relationship than if he was with a younger girl. Because an older woman is more secure in herself she makes less demands of her partner, and this is an extremely attractive quality that appeals to men, young and old.
If you’re dating an older woman don’t get too confident about your ability to keep your emotions in check. The moment you think you are in full control is when you are most likely to become obsessed with your ‘cougar’. Avoid becoming clingy and needy by treating her as your equal right from the start of the connection.
7. Counting The Numbers
There may be a sizeable age gap between you but reminding her of the difference in your ages does you no favours. Instead treat the age difference as an opportunity to learn new experiences.
8. Relationship Imbalance
Unless you both know and communicate what you want from each other, and the relationship, you are likely to create relationship imbalance. When you’re dating an older woman it is important to be upfront about what you’re looking for. If you’re looking for a casual no-strings connection let her know. If you’re open to letting things develop naturally tell her at the start. It is never a good idea to keep her guessing.
9. Being Too Passive
Just because an older woman has the confidence to know what she wants doesn’t mean that it is ok to sit back and adopt a passive approach. Be direct and assertive when asking an older woman out. Women like to show off their femininity, by taking on the passive role, particularly at the start of a relationship.
10. Failure To Appreciate The Differences
The rules of dating frequently change and an older woman will have experienced many of these positive, and negative, changes throughout her dating history. It is important to appreciate the differences between you – in age, life experience, likes and dislikes etc – in order to value your relationship with a smart and sassy mature female.